Summary

Domestication, the process of taking wild, untamed animals, and coaxing them into getting comfortable with humans over time, is the reason why we can have friendly, furry friends in our homes. If I were suddenly transported into The Lands Between, however, would I be able to tame any of the creatures fromElden Ring?

While there are plenty of monsters that’d easily tear me apart, like those big hawks with swords for legs at Stormveil Castle, or a Monstrous Crow looking for a person-sized snack in Caelid, there are other creatures that, with a bit of craftiness and preparation, I could probably make friends with.

A character in ornate armor with a red-plumed helmet crouched near a turtle.

7Turtles

Liurnia’s Entry-Level Creature For Aspiring Domesticators

As a confidence-building exercise, I feel like turtles are a good choice, given the minimal amount of risk. Sure, they could still take a finger or a toe from me, but after a week or two of tossing them grass, berries, and other low-cost, freely available goodies, I think I’d start to grow on them.

I doubt you’d put up much of a fuss if some stranger showed up and, despite your initial suspicions, started giving you some of your favorite foods every day for free. I surely wouldn’t mind if someone started tossing burritos from Taco Bell at me.

A character in ornate armor with a red-plumed helmet crouched on a cliffside near black and white birds.

6Guillemot

These ‘Penguins’ Sure Are Skittish

I figure there are at least three challenges I’d encounter domesticating these penguin-like birds: they’re incredibly cautious and aware of their surroundings, they tend to congregate around rocky cliffsides on the coast, and it’s likely that their primary source of food is fish.

So what’s the problem? Well, I’m not the sneakiest or quickest fella around, and my closest relatable experience to rock-climbing is standing on a five-foot tall boulder, but most importantly, even if I do capture a Guillemot, I suck at fishing, so it’d be a real pain to feed one. Regardless, I think I’d figure it out eventually.

A character in ornate armor with a red-plumed helmet crouchednear a snake-like line of round rocks.

5Rock Snakes

As Long As They Don’t Explode, I’m Good

Okay, rock snake is a pretty informal way to refer to these seemingly inorganic creatures, but… am I wrong? Nomenclature aside, I’m not too concerned about their crushing and rolling attacks, but an explosion would do me in for sure.

The plus side is that these creatures don’t appear to require food, so I think the hard, monotonous part would be the observation; figuring out different behaviors, patterns, and reactions to certain stimuli. Worst case scenario, I build a fence around a group of rock snakes and simply claim that they’re domesticated. What could go wrong?

A character in ornate armor with a red-plumed helmet crouched in a grassy field near yellow-red slugs.

4Fire Slugs

Classical Conditioning, One Spritz At A Time

I’m not sure if Ivan Pavlov, the dude who rang a bell before feeding dogs, and discovered their brains developed a connection between food and the bell’s ringing sound, evident through salivation even in the absence of food, would be proud of this, but here we go.

After getting some fire-resistant clothing,and preferably a nice shield if I’m lucky, I think the best approach with fire slugs would be training them to react how you want them to, since they probably don’t have brains to begin with. Thus, I’d splash them with water if they did something bad, and reward them with… I don’t know, Smoldering Butterflies maybe?

A character in ornate armor with a red-plumed helmet crouched in shallow water near a large, tentacle monster.

3Land Octopi

If The Mom Shows Up, It’s Over

Alright look, I’m not messing with the adult-sized Land Octopi since they’d give me a face full of beak in a matter of seconds, but the smaller ones are definitely fair game. With that said, though, I’d still feed the little guys with a ten-foot pole, just to be safe.

Alternatively, I feel like these wriggly little horrors would get tangled up in a net pretty easily, so if it comes to that, hopefully a merchant would be able to help me out. Who knows, maybe instead of Runes, they’d play some music and accept my sub-par dance skills as payment?

A character in ornate armor with a red-plumed helmet crouched in a cave near a Crystal Snail.

2Crystal Snails

Praying That My Dodge Skills Are Good Enough

Crystal Snails are where things start to get pretty dicey, since they tend to be found deep within caves, and live together in medium-sized groups. Not to mention that these snails have a wicked crystal breath attack, and can leap at you at surprising speeds.

I’m not saying it’d be easy, but if I got my hands on a few Sleep Pots, some rope, and a belt lantern, I could incapacitate one and hopefully have the strength to lug it to the surface. Ultimately, I’d say there’s a 70 percent chance I get instantly crystallized, but I’m willing to risk those odds to take a selfie with one.

A character in ornate armor with a red-plumed helmet crouched under a tall stone tower with a giant severed hand clung to it.

1Fingercreepers

For… Science?

Even if I were armed with a particularly good fire weapon, I think my attempts to ward off large or even medium-sized Fingercreepers would be in vain. Honestly, my brain would probably disconnect the instant one leaped at me, much like in real life if a jumping spider flew at me.

But, I’m a curious fellow, and while it might not truly be possible to domesticate these unsettling, magical creatures, that wouldn’t stop me from stuffing my pockets with shiny rings to try and lure a small Fingercreeper my way.